The Desert of Arizona
Dark as… Night! 27 Degrees
An effective way to be an advisor is to question the premise that a prospective client approaches you with. A simple example would be an exchange like this:
“Dear service provider, we want to hire you to do X because we want to achieve Y.”
“Dear client, what makes you think that X is the right thing to do here if you’re interested in achieving Y?”
Question everything. You won’t come across as a jerk. You’ll actually become more attractive.
This approach is even more valuable when you use it on yourself. When you take the medicine you give to the client and take a few tablespoons of your own, great things can happen. You will develop a new way of seeing!
I don’t know if it’s my rebellious nature or what, but this seems to come naturally to me.
One example is when I go out into the muggle world and see people arguing with each other about politics.
I have trouble fitting in the conversation. The reason is I don’t accept the premise required to talk about it. To me, it’s a silly conversation to argue about who you want to rule over you. No thanks. I’ll stand up and rule myself thank you.
Now, good things tend to happen when you take “medicine” like this and use it on someone’s business.
When you encounter problems they are experiencing, the first step is to not accept the problem as a valid one.
“I need to figure out how to get my clients to pay my invoices within 30 days after the project is over! Arrrgghhhh!”
Is that a problem to be solved? Perhaps. But not at the level it was created.
You don’t need timely payments. You need to avoid the possibility of late payments. Get paid in advance. (This approach usually triggers the “excuse self-protection system.” That’s when they start telling you all the reasons they CAN’T override their mind programming. Be ready… you’ll do it to yourself too!)
“I’m trying to figure out how to get my clients to respect me. All they do is haggle over fees and make it clear that they are more important than I am. Help!”
Is that a problem to be solved? Perhaps. Again, it’s a symptom really. But my “solution” to the problem would never to be to engage at the level of the problem. The solution would be to never convince ANYONE of ANYTHING. Then I ask, what would a system look like that could achieve that and still bring the clients you want?
This is what I do when I work with coaching clients.The other day, a coaching client called me revolutionary. I guess that’s a good word. It probably brings up feelings of some militant individual for a lot of people. But that’s only because that’s what they’ve been trained to associate with it. Revolutionaries are “bad” today, yet we celebrate them as the founders of our country. That’s a little bit crazy, don’t you think?
So a revolutionary? Maybe. But I’m talking about a revolution of your mind here. That’s a whole lot more powerful and whole lot more peaceful.
This “medicine” is extremely potent when you start using it. Try to take some every day and see how your vision shifts.
Are your “problems” really the problem? That’s the question to keep asking yourself.