I remember back to my days as a music student in college…
Year 1 was inspiring. I was a talented musician who ended up studying in the studio of one of the best organists in the world.
During that entire first year, I was drinking from the firehose.
From the weekly 4 hour performance classes, to the academic work, to all of the hours in the practice room.
It was all work, all the time.
Year 2 was different. Things started to fall apart. All of the “new stuff” I had learned now had to be assimilated and worked through.
This created a huge amount of stress, angst and all around discomfort.
I got through with lots of coffee and lots of wine (red please).
Near the end of year 2, things started to come together. I won a national music competition (my teacher had only ever placed 2nd 🙂 and my “voice,” my unique value, started to become clear to me and those around me.
Year 3, the momentum picked up. I started to pull free from doing what I was TOLD to do and started to think and make music on my own terms.
Year 4, I won a job that included other applicants WAY older with advanced degrees.
Me, the little punk, got the job.
Why am I telling you this?
Through struggle we grow. In fact, it is through struggle that we grow MOST.
No matter what you’re going through right now, you are prepaying for the future.
Everyone has to pay. You either pay now or you pay later.
What’s the currency?
Work.
Do your work because it’s worth doing.
Because not much will change. Even after you become “successful.” Whatever that word means to you.
I don’t think I’ve ever worked harder in my life than over the past few months.
And yet, when I wake up each day, I’m more energized than ever.
But I’m energized by the quality of my work more than by what the work is “getting me.”
I guess it’s the artist thing coming out.
What’s weird is that what I thought I wanted most suddenly takes a back seat to something I value even more.
I thought I would value the results. It’s clear now that the work is what is most valuable.
It reminds me of the expression, “Before Enlightenment chop wood carry water, after Enlightenment, chop wood carry water.”
I’m a wee bit shy of enlightenment, mind you, but I’m happier NOW to chop the wood and carry the water than I’ve ever been.
I realize now that the goal isn’t to finish chopping or to finish carrying.
The goal is to deepen the value I get and give in that action.