The Desert of Arizona
Clear 68 Degrees – 10:45 a.m.
Years ago, I wrote a promotion to sell a course called something like Extreme Confidence. I don’t remember exact numbers, but I remember that it sold well to a pretty big list.
I’d like to think it was my copywriting that did the trick. But come on, we both know that would be just a wee bit presumptuous of yours truly. So I can’t take all of the credit.
To be frank, it’s not hard to sell things people want. And that’s what we had in that case.
Confidence is in short supply. I think most people don’t even know what confidence is. And that lack of clarity leaves them pretty much lost in terms of how to get some.
Yes, confidence comes, in part, as a product of experience. But there are plenty of experienced people who aren’t confident.
Confidence can also come as a byproduct of a certain type of thinking. You can “think” yourself confident…maybe…for a few minutes, hours or even days. But it’s little more than a temporary solution if you don’t have a better understanding of what it actually is.
I’m going to give you the definition of confidence as I see it.
Funny enough, most of what we think of as “confidence” is actually the exact opposite.
While the strong alpha male with the steely gaze might embody the stereotypical definition of confidence, I’m happy to call that a bit of B.S. Most of those alpha folks I’ve met are so brimming with insecurity it’s hard to be in the same room with them. Hardly confidence right there.
Confidence is the product of being OK, NOW. You need nothing from anyone. Not only that, you want nothing from anyone. You are, for lack of a better word, PERFECT.
You have nothing to lose, you have nothing to gain. You ARE.
Extreme confidence comes from a knowing that you are enough as you are.
You don’t need proof, you don’t need logic, you don’t need anything but yourself, the way you are NOW, and a decisions to be OK with that.
Now if this sounds like we’re getting MIGHTY close to the world of the divine, the ineffable, the all powerful, well…
CONGRATULATIONS! You’re perceptive. But we’ll step back from the edge today so as not to freak anyone out 🙂
With this definition of confidence, something changes. What changes is the amount of power and control you can now exercise over your level of confidence.
This definition is not a function of your circumstances, it is a function of your perception.
You control your perception, no one else.
You want to build confidence? Then be ok with what IS. Stand in that despite what others think, say or do.
Your confidence might start like the smallest and weakest little flicker. But over time, it will grow until people will begin to come to you BECAUSE of it.
Don’t take my word for it, however. Just live it and find out for yourself.