No, Thank You

The Client Letter
August 7, 2012
Sedona, Arizona
Sunny 64 degrees

If you find yourself getting stuck with client projects you don’t like, at rates lower than you want, consider starting a new habit today.

Get good at saying, “No.”

THIS has been an area where I’ve had plenty of room for growth over the years.

You see, I have this affliction called “nice guy syndrome.” And I grew up being a “Yes” man. Yes I can do that. Yes I will do that. Yes, of course. This is a hard habit to break. It’s hard because it requires you to have a level of courage and confidence in yourself to say, “This is my life. I will make my choices as I see fit.”

REJECTING someone (which is effectively what you are doing when you tell a client “No, you’re not the right fit for me.”) often creates slight feelings of guilt. That’s what it felt like for me.

But that’s not reality, it’s just conditioning. And I see now that me acting like that is actually quite childish.

I’m afraid to “hurt someone’s feelings” and so my goals take a backseat to avoid that “conflict.”

This is a dangerously bad habit, one that allows you to hurt yourself over and over again.

I’ve done it too many times.

Granted, clients are sometimes hard to turn down. Especially if you want to keep the cash flowing.

But I finally realized one day that developing the ability to attract the right clients is no less important than being able to reject the ones that aren’t right.

There are two important reasons that turning away the “wrong” clients can produce good things in you business.

First, there are only so many hours in the day. You will die soon (relatively speaking), so for every client you work with, you are in effect giving the gift of part of your life.

That’s kind of serious when you think about it.

So weighing yourself down with work you don’t want to do or with work that doesn’t move you towards your goals is actually a really crazy thing to do to yourself.

On a less physical level, by accepting clients that aren’t right for your goals, you are sending messages to the “universe” that are very unclear.

Have the guts to commit to achieving your goals. That doesn’t mean you don’t help people. That’s the business we’re in, of course… the helping people business. But helping people doesn’t mean you help everyone.