The Desert of Arizona
Sunny 50 Degrees
I have to say, I’ve been extremely privileged to work with amazing clients. However, every now and again, one enters my space and there ends up being some resistance.
Either they don’t like my work, or I don’t enjoy working with them.
Again, it doesn’t happen often, but it does happen.
Now years ago, this got to me in a major way. To have a client express disapproval at something I was doing just pierced through everything right to that part of me that made me feel like crap.
I doubt the client intended this. I work with nice folks after all. In fact, I bet the client never gave it a second thought. But I did. Over and over and over again.
I was REALLY good at recreating that initial emotional reaction many times. Basically, I paid 10x (on an emotional level) for these instances.
This is a really bad trait to have if you are going to be an entrepreneur.
So what do you do when you hit resistance with a client?
I have three recommendations:
The first is to realize that you are in a movie. Become the observer of the movie, not a character in it. OK, part of you is in the movie, but it’s not the important part of you. The important and valuable part of you is just watching.
You just watch. You don’t judge. You don’t make up a story to go along with the movie. You stay in your seat in the theater and never forget you’re watching a movie.
What’s the benefit of this? It allows you to develop the ability to think and act in spite of circumstances. That skill will change your life right there.
The second recommendation is to rewrite what this means. When a client is not pleased, you trigger the story in your brain about what that means. I’m not saying play make believe. I’m saying you take what you used to think was a “bad” thing (you were trained to believe that the teacher “yelling” at you is a bad thing by the way), and begin to appreciate it for what it is.
It is a lesson. It is there for you to grow. And just think, you get paid to make yourself better! Life isn’t like school though. If you get a lesson in life and you don’t learn it, congrats!, you get to repeat it!
The final recommendation is to stop needing anything from your client. Need is a terrible disease. What makes it terrible is that it is an illusion that steals your power. Set your sights on helping your client achieve the objectives for your work together. That is what you pursue. You do NOT pursue a pat on the head, an accolade, or any other form of validation from them.
You develop that as a priority and you are dead. Oh, you might be successful, but you’ll be miserable.
Learn to give yourself what you seek from them.
You have far more power and control over your journey through life than you imagine.
These truths are not taught in school. School is meant to hide you from these truths. For once you uncover this power, you’re pretty much unstoppable.
And the powers that be just can’t have that…