The Desert of Arizona
Tut, Tut Looks Like Rain 65 Degrees – 6:39 a.m.
There seem to be two primary ways to bring someone (a client, friend, partner, lover, whatever!) into your life.
- You can pursue them and “make” them interested in you.
- Or, you can become the type of person who the other individual would naturally be attracted to and allow them to pursue you.
As embarrassing as it is, this second path was not on my radar until far later in my life than it should have been. But over the years, I’ve spent a lot of time with the material of David Deida, author of The Way of the Superior Man (among others) and done some of the work required to exist at this level.
Fair warning: I’m very much a work in progress!
Now this is in the area of my personal life; the part of my life where I make a commitment to become a man worthy of attracting the type of woman I want.
There are quite a few pieces to this puzzle, but one of the primary ones is that you develop the power to stand as the silent, conscious and fully PRESENT witness to an ever changing wave of feminine energy.
This is why, when my wife is upset, the last thing I would do is try to “fix it.” That’s the masculine (men can have masculine AND feminine energy and women can as well) way to solve a problem. “JUST SOLVE IT.”
I’ve learned (thank God!), there’s a better way when there is feminine energy is involved. You just stand there and LISTEN.
In a nutshell, you be who you are without NEEDING anything in return from another individual. Most people won’t believe that could lead to you getting what you want…especially in the context of a personal relationship.
And you know what? They’re right not to believe that. Because often times, it doesn’t lead to you getting what you want. At least NOT according to the story you make up about how it’s supposed to go.
“Getting what you want” is actually the very idea you must let go of. Getting what you want isn’t a goal worth pursuing. Being what you can be IS a goal worth pursuing. And that tends to bring to you many wonderful things, often far outside what you thought would be possible.
Does this sound familiar?
If you haven’t noticed, there’s an enormous amount of overlap between this approach in your personal life and using a similar approach in business.
Because we’re dealing with energy here. It’s just in different packages, which is why these connections sometimes aren’t so obvious.
The “causal” point on which you focus is YOU. You work on YOU, not on changing THEM.
What is the media platform? It is the “unchanging,” conscious, fully present demonstration of you. That’s the way you stand in the marketplace and demonstrate you without requiring anything in return.
“Not needing” is the foundation on which you are able to develop the ability to truly receive.